That’s my Max! You might be wondering why I put a picture of my dog when the title implies that I will be explaining why I have been gone for so long. I’m going to do that but my Max is part of the whole. I’ll explain in a bit. First I want to say thank you to Carol for looking into my disappearance. I didn’t realize you had sent me a message until just recently and I want you to know how much it means to me! You are amazing! Thank you so much for caring!
In March, I took a turn for the worst. I spent some time in the hospital, a real hospital not my long term care home. If you remember, I was trying to get off the Fentanyl and Morphine because of the side effects and get on a Cannabis Oil. I will tell you that the Cannabis Oil is such a better pain reliever then opiates and narcotics. If for some reason any you are in need of pain medication, try Cannabis Oil before you let a doctor prescribe opiates or narcotics. Opiates are highly addictive, you will need more and more while your body gets used to the drugs and trying to get off them is HELL! Let me tell you, it is pure hell and my body, in my weakened state could NOT get off them! I am so disappointed in myself. I know that I should not be disappointed, I do have ALS. I just can’t get my mind to except the failure. Or the failure that I perceive.
It took me quite a bit of time to recover from my vacation to the hospital and I will admit that I’m still not a hundred percent. It’s my mood and attitude now, mostly. I just don’t feel like myself lately. I’m down, I guess. I’m in a funk and I have not wanted to write a post because I feel like it will come across in my writing. No reason to bring down my favourite people!
During all of this time, a family member went through some pretty stressful stuff. I’m not going to go into any detail because it is not my secret to share. What I will say is that when a person you love goes through something that bad, the people who love them go through it too. You are in the trenches with them, helping them shoulder some of the burden. It’s what you do for those you love. Of course, you never know the depth of their respective but it affects you as well. You can’t help it and you, or at least I would not have it any other way. I need to be there for the people I love. Why am I fighting so hard to stay alive for if I can’t be there for the people who matter the most?! Right? Right.
That brings me to my Maxwell, or Max for short. During all of the turmoil of family stress, I had to say goodbye to my Max. I did it alone because my family members were already dealing with enough and quite frankly, I knew they would not have shared everything if they knew. My Max didn’t die or anything. He was living with my cousin Mike and his wife Melanie. They have two beautiful small children, Lilly and Sawyer. Now my Maxwell is old and his eyes and ears aren’t so good anymore. And you know toddlers, everything is face level and touch. My poor little Sawyer was probably just trying to play with Maxwell but Max bit poor Sawyer! I know, I feel terrible! And Max probably didn’t see or hear him coming and just got scared. Needless to say, Max could not stay with them anymore. You can not have a dog who is biting like that with small children. Maybe if they were older and understood, it would have been different. Anyway, we put my Max up for adoption and last I heard he was having his teeth done and then going to a new home. I sure hope he’s happy there!
Anyhoo, that is my speel. I apologize for being away for so long. I have a lot more recipes to share with you and I will try not to be away for so long going forward. Be happy everyone and take care of those around you! xo